Babybook

It's called Facebook for a reason, not Babybook.  If all I wanted to see on Facebook was updates about your stupid baby*, I would friend your baby, not you.  I should just unfriend these people who only post updates about their baby.  I don't care if your kid just pooped or is tired or needs a nap or needs a nap, but won't take one.  No one but you cares and you are too dense to realize that.

I'm irritable today.

* I don't hate babies.  I know it's not the babies' fault.

Shopping Fail

The hubster, the step son, and I went out Wednesday night for a Rita's run and I decided that I wanted to stop at a few stores before we got our desserts for the night.  I had a $20 gift card from Sports Authority that I spent on some new spandex shorts for officiating.  We then went to Old Navy to buy the step son some new flip flops as his current ones kept breaking.  While perusing the store, I wandered over to the baby section where I promptly spotted a pink superman onesie.  I automatically thought of my cousin and his new baby girl.  He loves superman and I thought it would be fitting.  I went ahead and bought it and a mailer to send it out in.  Right before I went to the post office during my lunch yesterday, I had a nagging feeling about the onesie.  I kept thinking I had seen it before.  I hoped on to Facebook and lo and behold, there was a picture of Parker in the onesie!!

I promptly called the hubster to see if I hadn't thrown the receipt away so we could return it. I'm just glad I caught it before it was sent out.

Anti-kid for now...

Here I thought with my sister in law and cousin having babies, I would want a baby.  And I kinda did for half a second.  And I kinda do when I read this mom's blog about her adventures with her cute kid.

But then, she posted a video/sound clip of a conversation she had with her kid, and now I'm definitely on the "no kids" side of the fence.  It was a conversation she had with her daughter before going to bed.  Here's the thing:  she transcribed the whole conversation so we could follow along.  I read the transcript before listening to the video.  It was much better reading it.  And here's why:  I think there is something about kids voices that rub me the wrong way.  I just zone out.  Their tone, cadence in speech, how they form their sentences and questions, and the subject matter.  I can't stand any of it.  I think subject matter has a lot to do with it.  The same thing happens when the stepson talks.  I just completely zone out when he starts blabbering on about Zelda or Uno or whatever the topic of the day is.  It's like random fact or obvious observations spewing out of these kid's mouthes.

And you know what, that's what kids do.  All kids.  And they are kids.  They don't have the mental capacity of an adult which I would like them to have.  I'm just not wired for kids or maybe the switch hasn't kicked on yet.

Perhaps if/when I do get pregnant, something about the amount of hormones will cause a chain reaction for me to become immune to these asinine kid conversations and then I'll be a great mom!  But then you'd think something would have to happen to prompt me to actually try to knowingly conceive a child.

Wow, this post is all over the place.  This is the inner struggle I have with the idea of me having a baby and becoming a mom.  The current battle right now is "I hate kids" vs "But what if I'm missing out on the greatest adventure of my life".

Family Baby Pool

I won!  I didn't win the overall pool, but that doesn't really concern me.  I just need to be better than my own family.  What did I win?  A onesie that happens to fit Parker!  Surprise!  I was asked if I wanted to give it to Parker and I said sure, but I wanted a picture of her in the winning onesie for bragging rights.

My brother who was also cced on the email told me I should have kept it for myself and taken a picture of Egg Roll wearing it.  My brother is something else.  It's a great idea, but I had already consented to giving it to Parker.

Babies

I have no desire to have kids and be a mother.  Did you hear that?  Listen real hard.  That was the sound of a very disappointed Chinese mother.

Anyway, the above statement is true 99.99% of the time.  When is that other 0.01% of the time?  It's when I read this blog.  She is by far the cutest baby/kid.  If, and that's a big IF, I have a baby, I want it to be just like hers, and if it's not, I might have to put it up for adoption.  I don't think I have a snowball's chance in hell to have a baby like that.  I blame the hubster; why did he have to be white?

Baby Stuff

My cousin's wife is pregnant with the first grandchild.  Very exciting.  He/she/it is due in May.  My cousin won't let his wife find out the sex of the baby.  How rude!  Anyway, I got around to looking at their baby registries and realized I had no idea what to get them.  I know from friends that a lot of baby stuff is unnecessary and just plan suck.  So I gmail chatted a good friend from high school to get her take.  By the end of the conversation, I had come to the conclusion that babies and the accompanying baby stuff are complicated.  All these new terms were being thrown at me: swaddling, bouncy seat, blow out (this wasn't in today's chat, but this was a while ago, I was shocked to learn this one), udder cover, my brest friend, boppy, bumbo.  It's like another universe.  I've got a good idea what to get them, but man, after talking with my friend, it left me the feeling that my parents were super parents and it's a miracle any of us survived with all these baby things available to us.